Have a happy day and a happy 2017 … its gotta be better than 2016

see ya all

TonyS

Hi,

Glad to see you all again.

2016 is all but finished (thank goodness), my computer works again, as does my heart, my pacemaker and my imagination.   So as long as I can  remember how to use wordpress and my web page I should be back in business producing my blogs (short fat stubby finger stories (formally short fat stubby finger publications) and yabba dabba dabba do within a week or two.

There have been some changes to the pre-published episodes of The Night of the Darkness (more later) and I will give those interested an introduction to my web page.

In the meantime I have included a chrissie present for you if like such things (a poem), though this one may have you scratching your head.   Hope you enjoy it.

Well, that’s all for now, because all I really wanted to do was wish you a merry christmas and a very happy and joyous new year.

Your Christmas present:

Who will save the Tiger

by Tony Stewart

Who will save the tiger

from the munchkins in the sky

who will save the tiger

from the martians who ate my pie

Will the boogie man come back again

will he follow me to the sea

will he be happy with just a scare

or will he want to eat every part of me

Who will save the tiger

from the grumpy whale

who will give him the chance

to tell his awseome tale

Will the tiger always run and skip

frolic in the lawn

chase after helpless deer

with the rising dawn

Who will save the tiger

from the perils of the day

who will save the tiger

please won’t someone stay

This tiger isn’t very strong

he needs some help this very day

so won’t you please save this lonesome tiger

please don’t walk away

As we mere morals carry on, regardless of the fact we are on the cusp of years (2015-2016), the world is going crazy around us.

If you don’t believe me think about the following;

   There are exactly 7 days between Christmas day and New Year’s Day … and yet there is a full year between New Years’s Day and Christmas Day.

It’s early days yet, but the biggest thrill on You-tube at the moment is an image of an eight year old scoffing an entire watermelon at the M.C.G. during the final test (Australia v West Indies) – (the green skin as well – which he described as crunchy).   It has already had over a million hits.

To keep things in perspective (and all about cricket) the image follows another highly popular image on you tube and twitter a couple of days earlier featuring a younger boy wearing a mullet haircut that would have made Billy Ray Cyrus jealous.  No real idea why it was so popular, but that’s the modern media for you

It seems the christmas spirit is not within all the visitors to Brisbane’s Chinatown with an eighteen year old on his way home after an enjoyable night out being floored with a coward’s punch to the back of the head by a couplr of hoons leaving him fighting for his life.

Now we have a grandfather killing his grandchild and atempting to achieve the same fate for his wife, his daughter and himelf.

I also notice that there are calls for the Qld Govt. to bring forward legislation to reduce pub and nightclub opening hours and help reduce the violence that takes place on our streets, but the licensed premises owners complain that ‘It ain’t their fault that people get drunk’.   So they should be allowed to trade all day and night, perhaps.    Probably based on the theory that the punters will eventually drink themselves sober.

Drug dealers probably think they get a bad rap too because of the actions of those that buy their goods.

The local daily paper in Qld (tabloid) seems to love its headlines more than the article it is headlining.   Recently they reported on the intrusion into one of South Australia’s major wine distilleries where one and a half million litres of new wine was released onto the floor by persons unknown.

But despite the loss of the company’s assets, the possible loss of jobs, the huge loss to the export market and the incredible job the company may need to recapture its market, the Qld newspaper was more than willing to detract from the fact that is was a criminal action by inserting a headline about spilt wine that was supposedly funny.

They weren’t much more subtle when headlining a story of an attempted stabbing murder of a young Qld couple by an interstate former employer when using phrases such as ‘Baker becomes a Butcher’.    Especially when the story proper is reporting on the woman’s condition in a Brisbane hospital where she is recovering from surgery caused by the attack and how deperate she is to have her young child in her arms again.

Did North Korea drop a hydrogon bomb?    The experts say no … the blast wasn’t strong enough, but what did they drop and why?    The opinion of some experts is that it was only an attention getter … but … .

However, on a much lighter note and easier to digest;

Channel seven Brisbane also seem to have a similar sense of headline humour (though it was funny to see) when the screen board displayed the on screen stats betweeen Dimitrov and Simon at the Brisbane International Tennis Tournament.   There is so much information (sets/games ect:) on display at the bottom of the screen, and so little room, they have to abbreviate the names and, because of this, we found ourselves watching a fine display of men’s tennis between ‘Dim’ and ‘Sim’.   It certainly got me in the mood for a little chinese take away.

Did you hear about the school boy in India who scored 1009 runs and not out in a school cricket competition in India beating the previous record of 628 set in 1899 by an englishman.     The boy hit 59 sixes – and 127 fours and was not out at the end of the innings.

And, have you seen Baby GaGa the 58cm stick insect (a Queenslander of course) now residing in Mellbourne.   PS: Mum’s name was Lady GaGa).

courtesy of the A.B.C.

Well that’s the end of 15 and the beginning of 16 and it seems a far worse place than it should have promised … lets hope things improve in the year of the monkey (chinese new year coming soon to a take-away near you).

Up next: short fat stubby finger poems for you to enjoy.

In the meantime chins up and keep smiling.

See Ya,

Tony

Just a quick blog to wish everybody a merry christmas and a happy new year for 2016.

I have just one observation to make on this year’s christmas and that is the fact it has been the lowest ‘commercial’ christmas season I can ever remember seeing.

Not withstanding the fact that the Christmas Toy Sale took place in July, there has been such a limited cash-in on the season as it drew closer to frutation, at least not on the north side of Brisbane.

Normally we are saturated by ads and promotions for months in advance.   Sometime around Easter we have Christmas trees popping up in every store’s windows or entrance – and the wreaths and things are high up on the walls and seasons long before December arrives.   But not this year.   There was hardly a tree on display in the mall.  There were hardly signs of christmas.   Halloween had a better rap.   It was everywhere.  But not so for Christmas.

in fact, most of the stores were so lacking in christmissee things that one wondred if we had somehow bypassed the entire last three months of the year.  A high number of stores had no displays at all – and those that did may have been better off without having any.   I am afraid a santa hat on a cardboard Storm Trooper didn’t inspire me to run around with a huge smile on my face in anticipation of the events of Dec 25.

Deck the Halls with Holly and the dozens or so other mall christmas favourites didn’t blast out around the aisles … or if they did they really weren’t being played loud enough to grab your attention.

There were not dozens of carolers strolling around in their gowns and holding candles.   More Santa’s than you could through a reindeer at, or charities galore trying to guilt you into giving them money.

It was lovely – it was peaceful – it was relaxing.

But funny enough, for all the lack of commercialisation this year, it is the first year for ages that I have heard so many people saying how much they were looking forward to christmas day this year … to the stuffing themselves silly with too much food … to spending time with their families … and to enjoy the day the way it was meant to be enjoyed.

That’s nice.   That’s lovely … and I hope you and your loved ones feel the same way too.

Well … Merry Christmas once again and I look forward to writing again for you in the new year.

See ya

Tony

Windows 10 somehow managed to take down my computer for most of yesterday amd when it did come back on I got the BLOG out as fast as I could, and it was only this morning that I realised that I had left out two important OMENS.

OMEN 1:    While this would be the FIRST win by the COWBOYS – it will also be the LAST game in the N.R.L. for BRONCO’S captain JUSTIN HODGES who had only barely managed to scrape his way back into the team following a charge from the game against the Roosters (the game that got the BRONCOS into the finals),  but fortunatly for him, and the team, his charge was heard by former PLAYERS rather than OFFICIALS as was the case for these charges in the past and he got a fine instead.

Stretching OMEN 2 just a teensy – weensy bit, the name of HAWTHORNE’S grand final winning AFL team CAPTAIN (played yesterday) was LUKE HODGE.

Well, best of luck to both teams and we will know the results in a few hours time (around 6.p.m. e.s.t..

See ya all

Tony S

Well I got my wish and both Queensland teams (The Broncos (Brisbane) and The Cowboys (Townsville)) will slug out this year’s NRL Grand Final in Sydney on Sunday 4oct2015 – and it is the first time ever that TWO clubs outside of Sydney will do battle in Rugby League’s homeland.

After winning this year’s State of Origin (again) this was a great way for QUEENSLANDERS to finish a season, but, of course, it became New South Wales’ footy fans greatest nightmare, though the N.R.L. won’t have to worry about filling the stadium as Queenslanders have infiltrated the state in droves – despite the cost that the airlines have imposed on them.   Australian airlines at that.

It is a fairy tale ending for Queensland footy fans, and I don’t think that either team will hold deep seated grudges if they lose – and the fans who back the wrong team on Sunday aren’t going be as upset as they may have been in other years because of who is playing.

But fairy tales can come true and this match has plenty of the ingedients required.

The Cowboys have been assessed as being robbed by poor umpiring decisions on several occassions over the past few years- decisions that prevented them from being in a grand final, but this year the gods of fair decisions have been on their side – and Johnathan Thusrstan, having won the PLAYER OF THE YEAR award for the fourth time, is well on his way to proving the experts right in their thinking that he is the greatest player in the modern era.   As the Cowboys ‘Captain he appears destined to lead the Cowboys to their first ever Grand Final win – and I doubt that one Queenslander would complain should he do so.   But the question that hangs low in the air is ‘Is he still carrying an injury?’ which had been the reason for his none attendance at the N.R.L. awards earlier this week (or so the rumour goes).

Well. whatever – Good luck, Cowboys.

But the BRONCOS have also had a fairy tale ride into the finals, including beating the Cowboys  two weeks earlier in the first semi’s round, then annihilating the Minor Premiers (The Roosters) 31-12.   They too have an injured Captain (Justin Hodges) who also narrowly escaped a penalty that would have punished him with a one game suspension (which would have been the grand final) because the gods of reality looked after him.    And , not only do they have GRAND FINAL experience (their last win was 8 years ago, they have the Messiah in their corner, possibilly the greatest COACH ever,  ‘Wayne Bennett’ who has only recently returned to the club – and although the expectation was that he would whip the team into shape for a tilt at the final in roughly two to three years, such was his inspiration and expert guidance they made it to the finals in his 1st year.   Go Broncos.

The omens:  COWBOYS: Johnathan Thurston won the Player of the Year award).   Johnathan Thurstan is possibly carrying an injury.    The Cowboys are going into the game as favourites (but they only finished the season third and the semis 2nd).    New South Wales footy fans are (in the majority) backing the Cowboys to win.    Newcastle has added a Cowboy HAT to a large portrait of The Saint painted on a mountain wall by uni students as a prank 50 years ago.  (BRONCOS)  The prodigal son has returned to the fold (Wayne Bennett).    The main reason most punters are hoping for a COWBOYS win is because they have never one won one.

Whichever way it goes I will be happy.

I doubt that I will find to time to watch the game, but my prediction is BRONCOS by a reasonable margin.

Talking about the gods of luck and chance,Freemantle (W.A.) PLAYER Nat Fyfe the BROWNLOW MEDAL winner,(the ultimate prize for an indiviual player in the A.F.L. – a best and fairest award with points awarded to 3 players from each team each week as judged by the umpires) did so without his team making the finals … and he not only won the competition, but he did it without even playing out the season.   He was scoring maximum points every week until week 9 where he damaged his pelvis to the point he couldn’t play any more this season – yet he still managed to accumulate (overall) 3 points more than his nearest rival and claim the medal at the end of the season – and broke the all time record for obtaining the most consecutive points along the way.

But no GRAND FINAL for his team this year.

Did you hear where ‘family’ grocery store ‘Woolworths’ are now giving ‘loyalty cards’ for use with poker machines in their many pubs with pokies in Victoria.

The way Tony Abbott is still whinging to anybody that will listen and replay his ramblings about being chucked out of the leadership role and the way other loyal members of the liberal party are  self destruction I wonder if we will have an election before Christmas.

DOCTOR WHO ALERT

More important than polytiks, did you realise Doctor Who’s Peter Davidson (the 5th doctor) played a self sacrificing cow that offered itself as the main course at the Restaraunt at the End of the Universe (long before Homer Simpson’s pig existed) in a guest spot in the last episode of the original tv series of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Well, that’s it for now,

Best to all

Tony S

What a wonderfully weird year we are having.

Firstly , with politics (and I have no idea if this is happening everywhere), but both the Australian Prime Minister (Coalition Party) and quite a few of his cronies, have treated their time in power as if they were still in opposition.    They have never seemed to have enjoyed the fruits of their labour, (good pun there, I thought), preferring instead to squabble in public when they weren’t continually raking the same old fodder about the faults and failures of the previous  instead of getting on with the job that they had been voted in to do -and when the Prime Minister wasn’t telling all and sundry that he had lied about virtually every single thing he had promised to do in order to get elected, his own department was leaking information to the press on an almost daily basis … and what they were leaking was usually a contradictory statement to the one the appropriate minister was just releasing.    Go figure.

But with the oddness of their reign at the top I suppose there is no surprise in the fact that another spillage has been called (a little over an hour ago) and we could have a new Prime Minister before I have finished typing this blog.

And a new treasurer .

And a new … and so on.

And our current P.M. is expected to lose.   Even Big Clive Palmer sent him a text.   “Goodbye, Tony” was all that he wrote)   Quote:  Channel Ten:  The Project.

If this is how the winners treat the corridors of power as a prize, I would hate to think what they would have done if they had lost the last election.

Here in the Queensland the incumbent party (Labor) (the opposite party to the federal government) have been carrying on like pork chops as they too spend more time berating the previous government while doing precious little in making things right – and they have this wonderful ability to totally dismiss the fact that the previous government had inherited a massive finacial problem from the Labor Party caused by the current government when they were in power not that long back – and they are the same problems they are blaming on the previous government.    

I can remember a time, not that long ago, when politicians applied to the public to be elected to do certain things that seemed to need fixing … now they only seem to worry about the next election from the moment they are elected.   And that applies to all parties as far as I can see.

Clive Palmer even sent him a “Goodbye, Tony” twitter so I guess our current P.M. won’t be the boss by the time the sun rises over the horizon.

I wonder if all these goings on will inspire the Labor Party to do the same thing before next year’s general election?

And while the dust is still swirling around the weird world of politics I am pleased to announce that an all Queensland Grand Final is still a strong possibility, though after seeing Serena William’s dream of winning all four grand slam events in the one year come to a grinding halt and Roger Fedder’s dream of being the oldest player to win a grand slam event also die a painful death, I know I am pushing my luck.    But we are Queenslanders … we are rough and tough.   We have teh best two teams in the comp.  We have Wayne Bennett in our corner … and WE STILL BELIEVE IN FAIRY TALES AND HAPPY ENDINGS.

Well that’s it for today.

The Night of the Darkness is due out shortly

Lots of Love and see ya soon

Tony

TRIVIA TIME

The latest technical innovation is a company that has created a screen for the back of trucks.   The idea is that a camera is mounted at the front of the truck and what it sees (the road and traffic ahead) is shown on the screen at the back of the truck so the traffic banked up behind it will know why there are hold ups or whatever.   Wonder how it looks when there are several trucks in a long queue and they end up showing nothing in front of them because the first one has a heavy load  and is moving very slowly.   They could also consider applying  the same thing to four wheel drives to stop us little fella’s (ford laser) from suffering claustrophobia when they surround us.

But I do expect that eventually somebody will start playing dvd’s on the rear screen and can’t you just imagine driving down a dark country road and the vehicle in front suddenly lights up and huge T-Rex from Jurrasic Park jumps out at you.

Talking about all things tekkie, Maccas in the states has come up with a container for pushbikes to carry your burger, chips and thick shakes.  Designed and created due to the increased number of cyclists purchasing their burgers through the drive in.   McDonald’s Made Drive-Thru Packaging For Bikes | Co …  Cool!

Those of you who bought the top of the range i-Watch would know that the leather case that it came in was also the charger for the watch.   Now IKEA have come up with furniture that recharges your various pods and phones while you are sleeping including bedside lamps.   You simply place the i-phone, or whatever, beside the lamp and leave it there.

TOTAL TRIVIA

Amongst his many roles, Martin Clunes starred in Peter Davidson’s first story, Twin Dillemna, in Doc Martin one of his neighbours is Ian McNeice who played Winston Churchill in various episodes of Doctor Who.

Heard a new expression of interest on Family Feud tonight when one of the contestants couldn’t remember what she was going to say as the answer to the question she had been asked.   instead she told the host ‘I am going through what they call a biodegradable moment.’

AND THERE’S MORE

The main two commercial television stations here in Australia aren’t doing too good at the moment.   Haven’t for a couple of years.   Well that’s what happens when you run too many reality shows and suddenly find yourself back to reality.  But the younger network, TEN, are doing extremely well, even signed up with FOXTEL in a partnership, and it is no wonder they are doing so well with their luck hitting heights that nobody could have anticipated.

I am talking mainly about their new soon-to-air show THE ZOO where animals are the hunters and humans are the hunted which starts next week.   The on-air publicity reflected on the premise that no one was safe while wild animals walked the streets and while TEN was busily promoting it during the day and night sessions, ALL NETWORKS were reporting almost the same thing  happening in GEORGIA where flood waters had torn down a zoo and released all of the inmates who were creating havoc (including maiming at least two people) on the nightly news.   As far as I know TEN didn’t take advantage of the situation, (but they didn’t pull the promos off air either).  The ratings will be interesting.

Talking about television, the new series of DOCTOR WHO must be coming up shortly.  That would be the only reason the A.B.C. network has been showing the ENTIRE series since Christopher Eccleson graced our screens in the first of the rebooted series and currently they are screening not one, but two series a week (one on channel 21 at 3.40 in the afternoons mon-fri and the other on channel 22 at 7.30 in the evening.   Must be trying to use all episodes up before the new series starts.

But it must also be hard for newcomers to the show (and they do exist – including my grand-daughter) especially when it puts the series (and the sub-stories) all out of kilter.  Not only are they running series 1 of the Matt Smith series; 7.30 pm abc 22, but they are also showing series 3 at 3.40 pm on channel 21.

Then, to make matters worse, they skipped the Christmas Special and the first episode of series 3 and went straight to chapter 2.   My guess is that chapter one of series 3 introduces Clara Oswald (the current doctor’s companion) and they are going to hold that back closer to the repeats featuring the current doctor.   Still leads to confusion because Clara makes several appearances with Matt Smith.

A final thing about Jenna Coleman, who plays the role of Clara Oswald.   Jenna was the central theme of a ‘will she or won’t she’  rumour about leaving the show late last year (since confirmed as staying) and to add fuel to the fire (or the publicity) astute viewers would have noticed in the first episode of the final two part story for the season Jenna received top billing for the show and that is unprecedented to my knowledge.

AND NOW A POEM FOR YOUR PLEASURE

Strawberries

by Tony Stewart

(from LOVE AND OTHER MEMORIES VOL 3) (tonystewart3.com/short fat stubby fingers)

I bite into a strawberry
it’s sweetness reminds me of your lips
takes me to a land so far away
to a sea of sailing ships

To a time immemorial
to where white clouds float aimlessly by
rambling slowly through the heavens
across the deep blue sea

To where the gods of love
drew plans up for you and I
and cupid shot his arrows
far up into the sky

And my mind becomes enclouded
between memories and a dream
of yesterdays and times spent with you
chasing after falling stars, or so the feelings seem

Holding hands and loving you
this is what I did best
but our love’s destiny had other plans
and so it failed the test

But these strawberries that I ‘m eating
keep my memories feeling sweet
Of times we went out dancing
I can feel a stirring in my feet

And better times that we once had
are coming back into my head
I don’t know why we broke up
maybe it was something that I said

But given half the chance
to love with you again
would be like some magic strawberry potion
would ease my every pain

Ah but memories are all that I have
of you and love and pain
and that’s all I’m going to have
till I eat strawberries once again

Well that’s it’s for the moment

But in the meantime, look after yourselves and I’ll see you soon

Tony S

Hi,

If you are fairly new to blogging like I am, and you recieved your blog advice via e-mail, this is just a quick note on how to enjoy the last blog I sent with a similar header/

OPEN THE E-MAIL … PRESS OPTIONS IF YOU E-MAIL SERVER ASKS FOR IT – THEN SELECT THE GREEN ASTERISK AT THE TOP LEFT HAND SIDE OF THE E-MAIL.

This will take you direct to the blog page and all the images appeaer there.

Cheers

Tony S

Doctor Who confuses me at times.

He keeps chastising his companions for doing things in different time zones.  “Paradox alert!”  He keeps telling them.  “Don’t do this – Don’t do that,”  he keeps ranting,  “It will change the future.”  Drives them all crazy with his obsessive fear that things will change for the worse.

“It’s life, Jim … life, Jim … life, Jim, life … but not as we know it.  Not as we know it’.  No, wait a minute, that’s Mister Spock talking to Captain Kirk on the Enterprise.   Spock could be just as bad at times.   James Kirk wasn’t much better … he didn’t want to shoot anybody, he just wanted to punch them out because it gave him a chance to take off his shirt and flex his muscles.   I think Jimmy’s obsession was Jimmy.

Anyway, getting back to the good Doctor.   Constantly worrying about the paradoxes his companions kept trying to create; Rose trying to bring her father back from the dead; Martha and Donna constantly banging on to him to save somebody who was about to die in a fixed point in time; Rory considering killing Hitler and save the world from ww2, then eventually trying to commit suicide with Amy so he could bring them back to life even though he was already dead, had been for one or two thousand years and so on was enough to push him over the edge.

I suppose it was no wonder the Doctor was having mental spasms.   But the Doctor eventually proved himself to be not only someone verging on the edge of paranoia, he has also been able to prove that he was right about what happens when you interfere with the chain of events that have already been put in place.

Not that I like the idea (or the reality) of war, but do you realise without ww2 we wouldn’t have had Radar, Gps, DVD’S, Aircraft’s Black Boxes, or the humble Microwave, just to name a few of the many things invented during the war which are still in general use world wide, or are progressive re-inventions of things that were invented back then.  The D.V.D., for example, is an extension of the VIDEO PLAYER which was invented in England so the photographers who flew over FRANCE could get better layouts of the German forces than they could get with single frame cameras.

No D.V.D.’s!!!  It would have been a case of, ‘Thanks, Rory … not!!”

But we are diverting again.  We are talking about Doctor Who and his paronia regarding paradoxes.  Let me show you what happened, and remember the doctor travels backward and forward in time, and sometimes sideways and this could often mean he could end up somewhere before it happened – or after it happened.  Sideways, you say.   In 2006 the Doctor and Rose, along with Mickey, travelled sideways to a parallel world where Rose finally got her own way and got her father back from the dead (sort of) and Mickey was able to move into a parallel world where he managed to take the place of his doppleganger without blowing the world up.    And why should he?  There were enough Cybermen there to do it for him.   But, of course, that is not the point.

But the Doctor … the Doctor who knew better than to do what he did … succumbed to Donna’s nagging and saved a fixed point family from being barbecued by Mount Pompeii (or, at least, the alien space ship that blew up and made the rest of the world think it was a volcano to blame).  Damn aliens … always blowing something up and blaming Mother Nature.

But this time the doctor paid for giving into Donna’s nagging and the end result was the doctor showing exactly what could go wrong once you interfered a set point of time.

This is how the doctor looked at the time he was in Pompeii.

This is what the man whose life the doctor saved looked like.

This is what the good doctor looks like NOW!

Well!!!   That’s another fine mess you got me into, Donna

BUT WAIT, IT’S NOT OVER YET BABY BLUE.

THE DOCTOR WAS GREATLY AFFECTED BY WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM BECAUSE OF DONNA.

I MEAN, WHY ELSE DID HE DO WHAT HE DID AFTERWARDS?

It is possible that he knows something that us wee mortals don’t, but I prefer to think he had a brain snap, because this was the second time that he had assumed a body of somebody he had met not that long earlier.

He first did it in 1983 (Arc of Infinity) where THIS Doctor

met this man

something happened here that would change the Doctor’s world forever

The man pictured with the doctor would shoot the Doctor (Arc of Infinity 1983) and as a result

This would happen in The Caves of Androzani in 1984.

NOW THIS GOT WORSE AS TIME WENT ON

This Doctor (again)

had a daughter (in real life – born 1984)

this man

had a daughter (the Doctor’s daughter – 2008)

this man

then married (in real life – Dec 31, 2011)

this woman

And you wonder why I get confused.

I am not even going to think about this incarnation of this Doctor

and what hqppened to his granddaughter back in the mid sixties.

I’ll just leave it all to you to work out.   In fact I’ll leave you to think about the whole thing and answer any questions you come up with.

Personally, I can feel a migrane coming on

See ya

Tony S

Is it a bird?  Is it a plane?  No – it looks more like a giant flying spider straight out of Doctor Who. Actually it is a drone watching some football maneuvers by the AUSTRALIAN KANGAROOS in preparation for their upcoming match against NEW ZEALAND.

ITS RUGBY LEAGUE MEETS SPACE INVADERS IN THE YEAR 2015 showing at a Football Stadium near you, the headlines should have read.

Although this is a RUGBY LEAGUE match, I am certain that it won’t be long before all sporting teams go hi-tech. Can’t you just picture it.   The Pre-Game Meal will include the player poring over the i-Pad to get the latest advice and propaganda from the COACH while slurping up 500 soggy weetbix.   Then getting dressed in the dressing room some techno geek will issue the player with a Pre-Programmed watch which will give them instructions as to how they play.  The watch face will show them where the ball currently is, whose got it, or who is about to get it and which way it going.  Whose the player in the best position to intercept, tackle, take the play, create a diversion and so on. If the state of play is too small on the screen, with a flick of a finger a holographic image will appear before them – and they must be absolutely certain that their blue-tooth microphone/speaker is turned on so they can hear the computer/coach’s instructions.

And whatever they do,  the players are not to use their initiative because they are likely to confuse their own players as much as they confuse the opposition in regards to what they are doing.

Wait until the A.F.L. players start wearing jet propulsion packs so they can jump further.

I mentioned in a previous blog that many of today’s inventions/innovations were simply re-workings of something that had already been around for many, many years, and the latest to fit that category is the humble record player which now comes with a laser needle.

The reason for the change is that the laser has been designed to to be able to play old vinyl and bakerlite records without damaging the record by wear and tear as the old style needle would have.

The way a record player works, in normal circumstances, is to place the needle which sits inside the end of a designed arm, into the outside track of the record while the record spins  on the turntable, and the needle remains in physical contact with the record until the needle reaches the hole in the middle of the record where it will either automaticly be removed from the record by the player’s mechanisim … or it will remain there until it is manually removed.

The laser needle only makes contact with the record through a light source therefore preventing unneccesary physical damage to occur.

 Now that’s what I call one for the records.

Pretty cool innovation I reckon, but then again so is the price which comes in at around $A15,000.00.  Now that price must be a record itself.  So I guess it is a record priced, record player.

And now for the weird and wonderful world of nature.

You know, I live in a typical suburban house in the Inner City area NOT the outer country areas such as Samford or Dayboro, but you wouldn’t know it by the amount of wild life that hangs around here.

Over a week this all happens;

Day one.  I walk out to the side door.  We are on the corner of a semi-main road (rat-run road*) and a normal side street so we use our side door to enter and escape the house, but the side yard (unfenced) is not much bigger than the front yard because the property was subdivided several years so there is little room for large gardens, and yet that in itself does not hide surprises from our eyes as this week proved.

Firstly there was a mad screeching outside the house and when I went outside to investigate I had expected to find birds fighting which is the norm around here, but no … instead I came across a new cat in the neighbourhood who had obviously been on the prowl for a meal of Kentucky Fried Mynah bird, only to find himself trapped under one of our bushes as around 10 or so mynahs were abusing him verbally, and I think they may have physicaly abused him had I not appeared on the scene, and once I did the birds seemed to have decided the cat had taken enough and flew off.

As soon as the cat realised they were gone he was off like a shot.   But he wasn’t a very smart cat and he tried again the next day, and this time he become trapped on the neighbours roof and again the birds won the day.  And once again he was fortunate that he found a way to escape.  He jumped off the roof, not a bad effort because the patch of roof he was on was around 3-4 metres off the ground and then he had to scramble over a fence that was 3 metres off the ground.

But escape he did.   That was a week and a half ago and the cat has not been seen since … perhaps he got the message this this time … or perhaps the birds … .

Anyway, the day after that I was checking the letter box when I reaslised a bat had dropped its business on my letter box and not only did he drop his droppings, but I am fairly certain he did so as an attempted in-flight selfie (see photograph below).

Now we have chickens and a rooster in the neighbourhood (pets) and all three get out now and then and scrounge through everybody’s yard looking for food.   But I certainly got a surprise on the third day when out of the blue (well it was actually behind some bushes in the front yard) one of the chickens came screaming into view … and two steps behind her was the local Bush Turkey who is often seen strutting about.  The chicken ran towards the house screaming out “The sky is falling!  The sky is falling!”, or something like that.  I am not eggsactly into chicken talk.  But whatever she was saying, both her and the words came to a screeching halt when she realised she had nowhere to go.   So the chicken did what any frightened chicken would do when being persued by the local stud.   Go from fear to a fowl mood, turn around and give him what for, and never mind the language differences … he’d quickly get the message … and she did … and he did.   And boy did he back off … literally.   The turkey didn’t just walk backwards, he ran backwards then as soon as he got the chance he was headed as far away from this crazy chicken as fast as his skinny little legs would carry him.   And the chicken, well she simply gave out a loud cluck then walked with such a swagger as she headed home I began to think she was part waddling duck.

But life wasn’t meant to be any quieter in the following days and sure enough as I walked out of my front door just after 7am the following morning I couldn’t beleive my eyes when I saw a bird of an unknown species attack a Butcher bird that was doing its best to stand upright on my letter box.  Now there are two thing that I need to explain first before telling you what came next.

Firstly there has been a mass envirmental problem in parts of the northside of Brisbane where freak weather conditions earlier in the year crated a mini early spring which resulted in the arrival of caterpillars on Poinciana trees in the thousands, a phenomena that covered several miles of the northen suburbs that ran in a virtual straight line between Wooloowin and Hamilton.

The caterpillars stripped the trees bare then most of them simply dropped off the trees and died wihin 24 hours as they lay on the ground.   Though some cocoons were left behind on the now bare trees as if in a gruesome reminder to the stangeness of nature.   The City Council advised that a similar event had occurred around 12 years earlier and, although rare, it was not an unusual event.    The strange thing about the caterpillars was that while food was in abundance, most of the birds in the area ignored the event and the caterpillars were left alone.   But after most of them had died (the caterpillars that is) the birds came back.

And that leads me to the other aspect of what I am about to tell you.  My letter box is an el cheapo tin thing built in a style where the lid is in the shape on an upside down letter U and this makes it extremely hard for birds to rest on, especially birds the size of the butcher bird who was gingerly balancing on it when I first saw him from my position on the landing which is around 14 steps above ground level.

But it wasn’t the balancing act that attracted my attention, it was more to do with the fact that he was trying to pull something out of the Jacaranda vine that snaked its way from its roots in the ground on the far side of the letter box up and across the trellis on the other side of the letter box.   Actually it was more to do with his trying to pull something out of the Jacaranda vine while balancing predariously on top of a letter box while being attacked by a bird of another breed around the same size as him.

The second bird had flown from the ground to the other side of my driveway, a distance of around fifty feet, gained altitude then swooped back across the drive way and straight down at the Butcher bird knocking him clean off the letterbox before assuming his place on the letterbox and immediatly attempting to withdraw whatever it had been that the Butcher bird had been trying to extract.   But that didn’t last long becasue the Butcher bird, and I am fair dinkum here, the Butcher bird jumped upwards and began flapping his wings once he was in the air.  honestly, he flew straight upwards and knocked the other bird for six.   I’ll swear he used his bent elbow to actually shove him.

Now while all this was going on and the first two birds were eye balling each other, one upwards, one downwards, a third species who had been observing the goings on suddenly swooped down on the Butcher bird and knocked him clean off the letter box again and the new bird assumed the right to be on the letter box.   But this didn’t last too long and before you knew it it was a free for all.   Birds coming and going in all directions, feathers flying, birds squaking and general pandemonium..  Then before you knew it it was all over.  The Butcher bird assumed himself to be the winner, flew back onto the letterbox, settled himself in position and resumed his activity while the other two birds watched on.  The Butcher bird had all but retrieved the object of his desire when the second bird attacked again and this time the Butcher bird admitted defeat and sulked off while the other bird completed the task.  The other two birds watched on and it was clear their eyes were full of malice, but they restrained themselves, eventually flying off as the winner scoffed down his prize.

And what had they all been fighting about?  Would you believe they each wanted the only caterpillar that existed in the entire vine, when they had ignored the appearance of so many caterpillars in the tree above their heads for days on end.    They wouldn’t have needed to eat for a month if they had dined on them the day before when they all fell off the tree.   So much for nature and the intelligence it is supposed to supply .

And finally there were the Kookaburras.  There were around 6 or 7 of them all shifting between trees over two streets and this was more than I had ever seen in one bunch.  Usually you saw just one by itself or occasionaly there would be three, but never have I had the pleasure of seeing so many together … and in a suburban street even.

But they weren’t there to give me the pleasure of seeing them.   It seemed to be more of a territorial thing. because they spent the 5 0r 6 minutes I could afford to spare to watch them in battle with some crows.   I am uncertain who was winning the battle, but the Kookaburras seemed to think it was them judging  the way that 3 of them would do battle in the trees across the road from where I live, then fly over to the power pole two doors down where they would perch themselves on the post or the wires that passed through the pole then break into uproarias laughter.

They would all lift their heads back into air then bend them back as far as they could before letting go with the loudest laughter I have ever heard from these birds.  In fact, it was so loud I couldn’t help thinking it was bunged on.  And naturally the first couple of times this happened I couln’t help but smile, by the third time I found myself joining in.  The more they repeated the sequuence the more I laughed and became worried that anybody watching me would think I was a kooky as the kookaburras.

And it wasn’t just the first three birds that arrived on the pole that were laughing.  After around thirty seconds they would fly to the trees in the next step and as they were flying one way, three or four Kookaburras would fly out of the trees and take their place on the poles.

Well, the animals and birds around this neighbourhood may be a tad noisy, but they certainly are entertaining to watch.

POLY TICKINS TIME:

I have always believed that the Australian poli-tikens are not real people,  just party clones so they will all toe the party line to a man, or is that party clowns?  I’m never too sure.   Anyway Bill Shorten, the current opposition leader feels the same way as I do.  Well he must if his comment on the telly the other night was any indication.  When referring to the goverment’s top two cabinet members he said, quote:  “Tony Abbott (prime minister) and Joe Hockey (treasurer) did (something or other) –  then finished his sentence with – who does he think he is?”   Boy, talk about split personalities.

Another poli-tik story.  One Australian State Premier has just stood down his Small Buisness Minister.  See, I told you size matters.

LAST NOTE BEFORE I GO! GO!:  Don’t forget the big fellas arive in town in a few weeks. JURRASIC WORLD is on its way and its reputed to be good.  Actually, talking about remakes POLTERGEIST 2015 version is also on its way.  As if the budget wasn’t enough to scare the pants off you.

The next two blogs, in order, will be EPISODE 7 of THE NIGHT OF THE DARKNESS, and it will be followed with blog dedicted to my web site.

See you all

Tony S

Well, G’day my old mates.   Time for me to vent the spleen again and let the world know what’s wrong with it.

But first a commercial:  Short Fat Stubby Finger Publications, the web site I started creating back in December is just waiting one last adjustment to PayPal (who else) and the site is open for business.  Mind you, it is not what you would call humongous as there will only be 2 draw-it-yourself books and 3 volumes of poetry available for purchase.  but that is not the point.  The point is that once it is online and working I don’t need to pretend to myself that I am some kind of super computer geek forever creating blogs and face-book and webs and other thing I don’t really understand.  I can throw all my time and efforts into writing again and become a writer geek instead (though I probably still don’t know what I am doing).

Seriously though, the books I am selling on the web site are all hand printed and bound and I really don’t want to throw them out to the wolves (Publishers or super sized chain stores).  It doesn’t really matter if I never sell a copy, but I can still share the poems in my blog.  The rest of the books on the site, as well as those I still have to finish writing, hopefully will eventually become e-books and print on demand books selling (theoretically)through various on-line companies whom I have been assured will actually give me a small percentage of whatever they make …. though that mightn’t be much either.

Anyway, the reason I am mentioning the web site just now is as a reminder for anybody who wants to read The Night of the Darkness (the first in the Edge of Nightfall trilogy) that I will commence blogging a chapter every week or two over the next year (there are 54 chapters in total plus the introduction/preface and epilogue) starting with the INTRODUCTION/PROLOGUE  (re-blog) plus a repeat of the other chapters already released.  This should should make it easier for new readers as all chapters will have a similar heading. All blogs for the serial will The Night of the Darkness and chapter number as the header and there will be nothing else in the blog.

Now back to more serious things.  The WORLD CUP in Australia and New Zealand is coming to an end with the two host countries facing off in the Final on Sunday and Australia is almost certain to cream New Zealand, but I’m prejudiced so there is no point arguing and if we lose I’ll just say ‘We waz robbed!’  ‘That’s the Aussie way, Sport.  never admit defeat – there was always a reason behind the loss.’

But what I actually want to talk about is a bit of trivia.  Do you know where the origin of a hat trick began and why it was introduced?

Well, it makes a lot of sense when you find out.   Years ago, when the majority of the cricket playing world were amateurs, if a player (bowler) took three consecutive wickets some of the officials would pass a hat amongst the spectators and the money placed in the hat would be given to the bowler as a reward for the entertainment he had just provided.   Well there you go.

well that’s it for the moment … except for the short note and the poem at the bottom.

Have a great Easter break and I will see you shortly.

Regards

Tony S

Watch out for the monsters in the night

Watch out for the aliens that live in outer space

Then begin to worry for the future

The future of the human race

Travelling

by Tony Stewart

I’ve tried so hard to leave some days behind
As I’ve traveled so far in space and time
But try and try as hard as I may
I can’t forget the days when you once were mine

In days when life
seemed so fair and free
No insurmountable problems
existed then – Not for you or for me

Yet little did I know
In those golden days of yore
That you were planning separation
Your love for me no more

My heart back then – ruled my life
I had never considered what I would do
If I alone shared my life
If I could breathe if I didn’t have you

Yet all along
Or so it seems
You desired something else
You never shared my dreams

So you left me flat and cold
When everything seemed so right
Sneaking off so quietly
Into the darkness of the night

Leaving me to travel on
Both in space and time
Unable to prevent my reminiscing
Of the days when you were mine

Sorry, but the original article with  the whole story won’t be arriving in the near future.

When it was being written I accidently hit the PUBLISH button instead of the SAVE DRAFT button.

The end result was that I spent an extra hour or so attempting to complete it only to find it all wiped when I tried to save the corrected version prior to republishing it.

If anybody actually reads these things and want’s to finish the story please let me know and I will make the time to re do it, but otherwise I feel to flat after wasting so much time on something that is totally under the control of the god of computer blog that I really can’t get inspired.  Especially when I have been doing at the expense of completing building my web-site and completing the editing of a dozen or so books.

Hope your day is going better than mine

See ya later, Alligator